Although I had already taken hypnosis as part of my Master Practitioner of NLP course,I took another course last week which spent more time investigating the use of language.
However, one of my ambitions is to write and tell stories, and I want to be able to do it in such a way that is entertaining and provides a strong message as well. In order to do that the language that you use, and the way you use it, are vitally important.
I have learnt a great deal more about communicating that I had never really appreciated, as well as bedding down some of that which I had already covered last year.
For instance, did you realise that the way you describe things must cater for everyone's preferences? Each one of us takes in our world through our 5 senses of sight, sound, touch, taste and smell. And that the reason we sometimes struggle to understand what is being communicated to us, is nothing more than a mismatch? That is, the language the other person is using may be their own preference, which is different to ours, and therefore, harder to identify with.
This is particularly useful in personal relationships, where it is possible to begin to experience frustration and other negative feelings when we do not understand what is being said to us.
A large proportion of the population is visual, so using words such "I see", "I get the picture", refering to colour, patterns and descibing the objects around, will capture most people's imaginations.
However, in order to capture those who are primarily auditory, words such as "I like the sound of that", "that rings a bell" or "it resonates with me" will make all the difference.
People who are primarily kinaesthetic (or feeling) using language such as "I feel that", "it is warm/cold" or "it was prickly" will engage this audience's attention.
Interestingly, even the order that you use language can make a difference. It is best to appeal to the Kinaesthetics first, as they quickly make decisions on whether something feels right.
Not only have I come out with a great qualification, I now have more skills around language that will most definitely benefit my business life, but also my ambition to write a novel - the sketch of which is in progress as we speak!
If you would like to find out more about how to communicate more effectively with those around you, then get in touch with us here at Relish, we would be delighted to be able to help.
Sunday 27 January 2008
Sunday 20 January 2008
Naomi House, The Hunger Project and other charitable stuff
In my earlier blogs, you will see that Relish People has already supported a couple of charities during 2007.
As you know, I have chosen to work on one of the fund raising committees for Naomi House (the children's hospice based in Sutton Scotney, just outside of Winchester).
We generally meet every month to discuss what activities we want to do throughout the year to raise funds, and we have 2 key events planned.
They include a Murder Mystery evening to be held at the The Manor House in Aldermaston on Saturday 8th March and a junior golf day at the Basingstoke golf club sometime in August.
The aim is to organise something people will enjoy, whilst donating money to the charity, and we are lucky to have a reasonable sized committee that makes organising these events worthwhile.
I volunteered for 2 reasons, one is that the Chairman, Debs Loveridge, lost her sister to cancer. I remember Kim (my namesake) as someone who lauged at the world, even though she knew she was dying of cancer, demonstrating incredible strength for a woman of such young age. I have lost a number of family to cancer in the past, and it seemed a great way to give something back, whilst supporting a good friend in something that she passionately believes in.
Secondly, when we set up Relish People originally, our plan was always to build charitable work somewhere into what we do, and we proposed that anyone who worked for us, would get 1 week's paid leave to get out in the local community to 'give something back' by giving up their time to help others.
Wendy has chosen The Hunger Project, and is off to India this week to find out more. When she gets back and explains it to me, perhaps I will be able to elaborate more!
Why am I telling you this?
During the past week, I have been looking at a number of business websites, (research for approaching companies wanting to work with them) and I have been surprised at how many have a section dedicated to Corporate Social Responsibility.
As a smaller organisation that is still in its infancy, it is easy to start to decide what you will and won't do, and we have the flexibility of being able to change and adapt quickly. Here at Relish People we think we have started to adopt some simple ways where we can make a contribution and fits nicely into what we believe!
Watch our website over the next couple of months, and you will see some changes that begin to relect these!
As you know, I have chosen to work on one of the fund raising committees for Naomi House (the children's hospice based in Sutton Scotney, just outside of Winchester).
We generally meet every month to discuss what activities we want to do throughout the year to raise funds, and we have 2 key events planned.
They include a Murder Mystery evening to be held at the The Manor House in Aldermaston on Saturday 8th March and a junior golf day at the Basingstoke golf club sometime in August.
The aim is to organise something people will enjoy, whilst donating money to the charity, and we are lucky to have a reasonable sized committee that makes organising these events worthwhile.
I volunteered for 2 reasons, one is that the Chairman, Debs Loveridge, lost her sister to cancer. I remember Kim (my namesake) as someone who lauged at the world, even though she knew she was dying of cancer, demonstrating incredible strength for a woman of such young age. I have lost a number of family to cancer in the past, and it seemed a great way to give something back, whilst supporting a good friend in something that she passionately believes in.
Secondly, when we set up Relish People originally, our plan was always to build charitable work somewhere into what we do, and we proposed that anyone who worked for us, would get 1 week's paid leave to get out in the local community to 'give something back' by giving up their time to help others.
Wendy has chosen The Hunger Project, and is off to India this week to find out more. When she gets back and explains it to me, perhaps I will be able to elaborate more!
Why am I telling you this?
During the past week, I have been looking at a number of business websites, (research for approaching companies wanting to work with them) and I have been surprised at how many have a section dedicated to Corporate Social Responsibility.
As a smaller organisation that is still in its infancy, it is easy to start to decide what you will and won't do, and we have the flexibility of being able to change and adapt quickly. Here at Relish People we think we have started to adopt some simple ways where we can make a contribution and fits nicely into what we believe!
Watch our website over the next couple of months, and you will see some changes that begin to relect these!
Monday 14 January 2008
12th January - Did you survive?
12th January has been cited as the day that most relationships finally break down.
Here, at Relish, we have seen an increase in the number of people approaching us with relationship difficulties that have been highlighted over the festive period, which, when combined with the New Year when thoughts turn to the future,needs to change.
So what is it about the Christmas period that accentuates this trend more than any other time of year?
Well, Christmas is a very exceptional time of year with most of us having a very clear idea of what it should be like, particularly women. Combined with the expectations, there are the - overindulgences, the xmas parties, long hours at work finishing off or just getting things done before the holidays, the weather, suddenly being cooped up with relatives who are great, except for extended periods of time and the list goes on...
Most people put on some sort of front, for fear they will be criticised for being a 'bah humbug' and the tension (be it excitement or pressure)begins to rise and until somewhere, it has to be released.
In the majority of cases, this can be done safely and easily, as a solid relationship will be able to cope with any fallout. However, for a relationship in trouble, it just highlights how unhappy you are, as everyone around you appears to be having a good time.
A survey has identified that up to 30% of relationships that break down after Christmas, the decision to split was taken before the festivities on some level, and was only postponed, generally, because of guilt.
Of course, just because there was a falling out over the festive period, does not mean that the relationship is on the rocks. It does mean though that there is something in the relationship that may need looking at and now we are into January, this is an excellent time to do it.
Here at Relish, we are great at helping people get to the root cause of what is going on for them, and if you are in the position of knowing your relationship needs a little help, then call us for a free consultation session and find out how we can help you get it back on track!
Sunday 6 January 2008
2008 - New Year Resolutions
Hope you all had a Happy New Year!!
Wendy and I were back at work on the 28th December, using the time between Christmas and New Year to sort out all those bits of paper, filing, and notes that fell by the wayside during 2007.
I always enjoy this time of year, as there is a sense of being able to put everything behind you and to 'start afresh'. I have always enjoyed planning what I will do, where I will go and how I will be different.
2007, was most certainly a big year in personal change for me. During that time I improved my underlying health and my attitudes and behaviours using the NLP training that I undertook and a number of other personal development courses I attnded.
It is hard to see how I am going to top that in 2008, but top it I will!
I have many plans for this year, most are actually about putting in place the foundations for my future, things such as learning to speak Italian, as I want to go and live there for a year; learn storytelling, as I plan to do more guest speaking this year; and making more time for my family and friends, so that I have more to look back on in years to come when I am sat in front of a roaring log fire. (Or on the doorstep somewhere on the Mediterranean with a beer in one hand a book in the other, dishing out pearls of wisdom!):)
However, one challenge I face, along with many others, is keeping that enthusiasm and excitement going much beyond February. I still do achieve the things I want eventually, and not necessarily in the way I had planned, but sometimes somewhere along the way, it is all too easy to 'forget' what you are aiming for, what you are supposed to be doing or maybe, life just gets in the way...
This is where it is important that we understand why we set the goals/resolutions in the first place.
Was it for ourselves? Or as a result of someelse's expectations? Very often we set our New Year's resolutions because there is external pressure to do so, because we think we should/ought to; it is what is expected. Or because somewhere inside of us, we 'believe' we should do it.
However, if we are not 100% bought into the change at a mental, emotional, physical and spiritual level, then we are setting ourselves up for potential failure.
It is worth asking yourself why is it important to you? What is it that will keep you sticking to the change when you are tired, stressed, short of time etc? What will you do, say or be that will ensure that your change becomes habit, a part of you?
If, like me you find yourself losing sight of what you wanted to acheive, write your goals/resolutions down, you can then constantly refer to them to remind yourself and just as important make sure that you plan time for them, as during busy times, those things that are not yet habit can have a tendency to be put on the 'back burner'.
And if your focus changes during the year? Then know that it is OK! This is your life and what is right for you in January, may need some adjustment by June anyway, as one way or another, things will have changed somehow!!
Hope 2008 is a great one for you!!
Wendy and I were back at work on the 28th December, using the time between Christmas and New Year to sort out all those bits of paper, filing, and notes that fell by the wayside during 2007.
I always enjoy this time of year, as there is a sense of being able to put everything behind you and to 'start afresh'. I have always enjoyed planning what I will do, where I will go and how I will be different.
2007, was most certainly a big year in personal change for me. During that time I improved my underlying health and my attitudes and behaviours using the NLP training that I undertook and a number of other personal development courses I attnded.
It is hard to see how I am going to top that in 2008, but top it I will!
I have many plans for this year, most are actually about putting in place the foundations for my future, things such as learning to speak Italian, as I want to go and live there for a year; learn storytelling, as I plan to do more guest speaking this year; and making more time for my family and friends, so that I have more to look back on in years to come when I am sat in front of a roaring log fire. (Or on the doorstep somewhere on the Mediterranean with a beer in one hand a book in the other, dishing out pearls of wisdom!):)
However, one challenge I face, along with many others, is keeping that enthusiasm and excitement going much beyond February. I still do achieve the things I want eventually, and not necessarily in the way I had planned, but sometimes somewhere along the way, it is all too easy to 'forget' what you are aiming for, what you are supposed to be doing or maybe, life just gets in the way...
This is where it is important that we understand why we set the goals/resolutions in the first place.
Was it for ourselves? Or as a result of someelse's expectations? Very often we set our New Year's resolutions because there is external pressure to do so, because we think we should/ought to; it is what is expected. Or because somewhere inside of us, we 'believe' we should do it.
However, if we are not 100% bought into the change at a mental, emotional, physical and spiritual level, then we are setting ourselves up for potential failure.
It is worth asking yourself why is it important to you? What is it that will keep you sticking to the change when you are tired, stressed, short of time etc? What will you do, say or be that will ensure that your change becomes habit, a part of you?
If, like me you find yourself losing sight of what you wanted to acheive, write your goals/resolutions down, you can then constantly refer to them to remind yourself and just as important make sure that you plan time for them, as during busy times, those things that are not yet habit can have a tendency to be put on the 'back burner'.
And if your focus changes during the year? Then know that it is OK! This is your life and what is right for you in January, may need some adjustment by June anyway, as one way or another, things will have changed somehow!!
Hope 2008 is a great one for you!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
